Doesn’t make a hell of a lot of sense to do a Thanksgiving post close to a month after the fact, but I just want to thank the forces of the universe, the United States military, and all the geeks, nerds, technicians, CERN, Tim Berners-Lee and Robert Cailliau, Jeff Bezos and many many more for inventing the Internet, the Web, Amazon, etc.
Much like I wonder how people worked 9-to-5 office jobs before the internet era, I wonder how people survived Christmas shopping without the web. Don’t get wrong, I actually dig going to a mall at least once during Christmas season or knocking over Japanese people in Soho or elbowing yuppies trying to push their double-wide stroller through the single-lane Christmas shops at Union Square. What I don’t like doing is having to, you know, actually buy things while there. And considering that 99.9% of my gifts must end up in Louisiana anyway, well, forget about it.
The Internet is probably one of those things that’s stopping you from seeing me on the evening news after an unseemly incident with a Santa Claus.
KEN WHEATON 
As I completed my Christmas shopping this morning, which amounted to placing my last order at Amazon.com for the season, I reflected back on this blog post.
And I am the one who was on the evening news for balling out the clerk at Target for not taking me next when he opened a new register. (I had been waiting 20 minutes, and he took the person just walking up.)