That’s Some Shit

Literally, that’s what it was. Shit. Of the human kind. Lots of it just sitting there on the subway platform this morning. Bergen Street stop on the 2/3 line. Manhattan bound. I almost took a picture of it, you know, just to share with everyone, but I wondered if that would be crossing some line, a new low for civilization. It’s bad enough we photograph and post all of our damn meals these days. Now I’m gonna post a picture of the end result? And it wasn’t even mine?

Besides, my train was coming.

I have to wonder about the hobo that left that package, though. Because there was just so much of it. Were there vital parts of him in there? And where did he go? Onto a Manhattan bound train? That’ll ruin your commute!

I did take some small delight though in thinking of some douche boarding or getting off the train, playing with his damn phone instead of paying attention to where he is going, getting his just reward.

They’re Called BABY Wipes

One day, in the last ten years, I was standing in someone’s bathroom, going about my business, when I noticed a tub of Baby Wipes on the back of the toilet. This struck me as odd as there were no babies in the house. If there were no babies in the house, what could they possibly be . . . using . . . the . . .

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